Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Denial Is A Cruel Bitch Mother

Now thats a topic headline!!

I do believe that I must have some form of quirky (or witty) first post but I must be truthful (to my MANY MANY MANY SUBSCRIBERS AND READERS!!!! SINCE I LOVE YOU ALL SOOOOO MUCH.) I find that writing an opening for a blog/essay/anything is rather dull so I think I can only leave you with this wonderful little story I made up from the top of my head. (Since no one will actually read it)

Once there was a horse name "Extravagantor". Extravagantor went to a store to get some wonderful farm hay (hey!) for his family. He went to the cashier and asked (yes he can talk HE IS EXTRAVAGANT!) "Could I buy some good hay kind sir?" and the cashier tells him the same thing that he tells any animal that comes walking through the door " Oh baby Jesus! A talking animal folk!" So he busted out his tactical 12-gauge shotgun and shot a cap in Extravagantor's ass. Of coarse we all know he's called Extravagantor for a reason, so he reflected the shot with his bullet proof skin and told the cashier "YOU'VE BEEN BAD JOHN! YOUR GOD IS NOT PLEASED!" And so the cashier/John combusted into a ball of flame and Extravagantor obtained his hay without actually paying. That lucky bastard!

Fin!

I hope this post was actually productive!
More to come!

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